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Coaching Children's Behavior and Emotions
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Curbing minor behavior issues quickly and effectively
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There are many times when the child’s behavior does not really require “The Talk.” In less serious moments, there are a few tools that work better than others to get the situation back on track, without coercion or guilt.
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5 Approaches to Discipline
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How does one correct maladaptive behavior without using punishment, guilt, rewards, or sidling up friendly like?
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Success Counseling
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Sequel to the “5 Approaches” article above. Gain a better understanding of how to coach children toward an internally desired, positive, future state. Plus, numerous pages out of the “how-to” section of the Augustan staff manual.
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Picking up the rope
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“No!” “You can’t make me!” “But why?!”
These are the beginning of a “game” of tug-of-war. Learn how to recognize rope throwing, and deal with it positively and powerfully.
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Play is Serious Business :-)
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101 Things Every Child “Should” Do
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Lists such as this are of course completely arbitrary, but they can still be fun, insightful, and useful as inspiration. From a book by the same title.
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Games Without Electricity
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Games for a bit of time here and there . . . we’ve seen literally thousands, and here are a couple dozen of our favorites, nicely categorized for your convenience. We don’t list most games, as there is a catch, or it is much easier to see it, rather than read & play it.
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Special Wakeups
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Imagine you wake your child up in a way that engenders Wish, Wonder, and Surprise, as well as joy and play and connection! And, see below for a thorough understanding of Wish, Wonder, and Surprise – have your life become more magical.
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Play . . .
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Articles and information about why play is crucial to children’s development, and the state of play in childhood now. Also, beyond the obvious joy of play, what are a few of the mental advantages of more specific kinds of play?
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Embers (family time)
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Around the dinner table, on a longer car ride, before bedtime, at bedtime, with extended family, and scores of other times . . . create connection, understanding, awareness, character, laughter, history, a sense of family, and a host of other positive ends by being together with these topics, adventures, challenges, and experiences.
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Stories!!
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After reading more than 7000 short stories of all descriptions, here are some of my favorites that are no longer copyrighted. In addition, a catalog of stories by theme is included – ask me for one you’re curious about. Short video here too. And, send me stories you love!!!
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Media and Children
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Research centers on media
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From Pew to Kaiser to others, there are both useful and diverse perspectives on media in, particularly, children’s lives. Some surprises and comforts here for all.
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Media consumption levels
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The centers above have loads on this, yet, the articles and information included here offer some nuances and perspectives not readily included elsewhere.
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Interactive media/devices
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From smart phones to Facebook, a few articles and thoughts for your consideration on the wise and unwise use of these tools.
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Media shaping who we are
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What’s happening to the brain, our social connections, our imaginations, our memories, and our passions? Ponderings for the journey all of us are on.
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Media: school presence and effect
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How does media influence children and teens at school, both in their experience and mental and emotional lives? Thoughts from a couple viewpoints.
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Media and women
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Body image, beauty, sense of self, sense of culture and place . . . explored here.
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Video games and children
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Passionate perspectives on both sides of the issue. Read a bit here.
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Can’t get enough? More on media
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How about males and media and a few other choice articles to meditate on?
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More on Children’s Development
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40 Developmental Assets
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They are positive experiences, opportunities, and personal qualities that all children and adolescents from many cultural backgrounds need to be responsible, successful, and caring. Learn what they are and how camp can help to foster some of them.
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Self-esteem
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Learn what self-esteem is and is not. Common misconceptions are also addressed. If you haven’t seen the very short 20/20 piece on self-esteem, watch it here!
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Wish, Wonder, and Surprise
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Creators of any ilk entreat Wish, open to Wonder, and are readily tickled by Surprise. Learn what they are, how they are experienced in normal life by children and adults, how children experience them at camp, what is different about Wish, Wonder, and Surprise at camp, and how to enrich daily family life with Wish, Wonder, and Surprise.
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Videos for Enlightenment
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These videos shed light on areas of American culture that many people are not fully aware of. It is important to understand the culture, the sea we’re swimming in, in order to effect and direct it.
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Character insight
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What works and what doesn’t in raising people of character? Find out some best practices here. And, numerous ways to make those concepts concrete and real.
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Wall of Cool
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Cool kills. Stops a person from living. From following their heart and their passions in a given moment. In teens, and even younger, (and counselors and other adults too!) this destructive impulse caused by Cool is frequently presented as a “Wall of Cool.”
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Competition
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A one-page philosophy on competition. Competition has its place, and its misplace, and its healthy, and unhealthy, orientation. A 15-page version is available on request.
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Sleep!
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Learn how much sleep is enough, what happens with a little and lots less sleep, pharmaceutical orientations toward sleep, mystical orientations, and sleep articles and tidbits that will make you the life of the party as you regale people with your knowledge!
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Helicopter parenting
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Webster definition: a parent who is overly involved in the life of his or her child. Yup, a Wikipedia page on it too. Find here six articles that explore this concept for good and for ill. And, no, such parents are not “bad” or “wrong.”
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Communication to Improve Your World and Relationships
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Clean Communication
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One hallmark of a healthy environment inside or outside of a camp is “clean communication.” Learn the six faces of dirty communication, and how to avoid them. Critical information for all interpersonal relationships. Dr. Grayson created website.
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Difficult Conversations Made Easier
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Learn how you can say to yourself “I’m confident that I can bring up a difficult issue and have us both walk away happy, and with clear intentions for change.”
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Communicating Emotion Intelligently
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Learn several tools that will enable you to take aggressive and unhelpful statements/conversations and turn them toward positive and constructive ends. Turns daggers into flowers.
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Compassionate communication
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A body of work by Dr. Marshall Rosenberg shapes our every word and conversation at camp, as well as our thoughts. In essence, it is about powerfully working with needs and feelings to create connection and shared understandings . . . Emotional intelligence.
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Three words to breathe easier
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These three words changed my life and the lives of those around me. Invest 5 minutes and see how they might change yours as well.
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Intentional Speech
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With the above three words under your belt, you’re ready for more! Dive down the rabbit hole toward more powerful, intentional, and compassionate speech!
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Four-ish letter words
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Good, nice, mean, cool, fine, like, sure, okay, alright, awesome, whatever, yeah . . . these words can be pretty empty. Learn more about them and how to speak with more clarity and depth.
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Educational Praise
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“Good job” and “that was great!” are often heard coming from adults when speaking to children. Learn how to be more specific and effective with your praise. And, check out the video under “Self-esteem” above.
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5 Leadership Styles
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This useful framework quickly identifies five common approaches toward leading others. Leadership is largely an Emotional Intelligence (EQ) – see www.visionrealization.com for a quick PowerPoint with audio annotation of EQ.
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Camp Specific
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The Heart of Camping
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Physical and mental elements of camps are often considered, but the heart of a camp is where the power, meaning, and connection often happen. Learn the benefits of finding a camp with heart, as well as how to pick out such a camp.
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Nature and children
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Duh, right? You know being in nature is valuable for children, and adults. Some pieces you likely didn’t know about the benefits, prevalence, and urban living are found here from numerous sources. Fun quotes too.
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Homesickness
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95% of campers report some feelings of missing home. This is natural and normal. Learn more about homesickness and how to deal with it.
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Serious Fun
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Fun is also the byproduct of learning, whether it be a physical ability or an emotional one. Serious fun is fun too.
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Other Augustan Websites
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by Augusta’s Director, Randall Grayson, Ph.D.
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www.cleancommunicate.org
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Dedicated to creating awareness and understanding around one’s words and actions, especially interpersonally. Having your words and actions reflect your mind and heart . . . simple, yet very nuanced and challenging. Learn the 6 faces here.
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www.functionalconsensus.org
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Coming in 2012
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www.visionrealization.com
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Camp information website for other youth development professionals, which also includes a few resources of interest to parents, including: Emotional Intelligence and The Art and Science of Mistakes.
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www.greatcampprograms.com
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Wide variety of programs available to other organizations, created by Camp Augusta.
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howtochooseasummercamp.org
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Coming in 2012
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www.picyourwords.org
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Coming in 2012
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Golden Bits and Bobs
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Integrity
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Whole. Complete. People of integrity act consistently across many situations and among many different people. They are maskless. Three components of integrity-as-wholeness are: 1) Honor Agreements; 2) Act in Accordance with Principles and Values; and 3) Word as Self. Explore this concept in organized depth here.
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Forgiveness and trust
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Coming in 2012
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Pot, drugs, and prescriptions
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A few interesting articles on the subject as food for thought.
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E-mail and Text guidelines
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E-mail/texting is pervasive, and more so with children and teens, yet etiquette and guidelines around it are sparse. The results can be pleasing or toxic. What we find useful is summarized here.
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Favorite tools on the web
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An organized list of some of our favorite tools on the web, in a range of categories such as education, travel, media, collaboration, photography, and security.
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Connection rituals for parents
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Regular, meaningful, moments of connection strengthen close relationships. Read more about them in this book excerpt that Dr. Grayson is working on finishing.
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Special Pages
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Over the decades, Dr. Grayson has gathered numerous little inspirational passages, musings, and tidbits, some of which also educate, while others briefly instruct. You’re sure to find something here you will appreciate. Enjoy!
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